


Whiskey fixes everything, right?

by Skyward_sarah



Series: When angels fly [1]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Character Study, Gen, Minor Character Death, Original Character Death(s), mario kart and alcohol are the way to go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-19 05:32:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5955508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyward_sarah/pseuds/Skyward_sarah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Things happen that break the foundation of life. Ransom is a coral reef that can't afford to collapse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Whiskey fixes everything, right?

**Author's Note:**

> I always felt like Ransom would be an interesting person to do a character study on. ya'know?? Putting him in situations that are core aching. it gr8.

“Justin, oh god Justin,” there was crying and Alice was trying to talk over it. “Justin. It's Isaac.”

Justin almost didn't hear what came next. He didn't want to believe anything she said. When she hung up, tears were rolling down his face, and Justin threw his phone at the wall across from him.

This wasn't happening, it can't, he refused to believe it. Not Isaac, no no no nO.

Then Bitty was in from of Justin, his small hands rubbing his arms and the sensation was too much. But tears kept him from telling Bits to stop.

Holster was there too, and Bitty started to lead Justin in breathing exercises. His lungs were burning and his throat was raw. Bits offered pie, but Justin was sure that if he ate, it wouldn't stay down. 

He needed this to stop. He needed them to leave, and he needed to disappear.

Justin left his friends sitting on the floor and climbed into bed. Maybe if he lay there long enough he would wake up from this hideous dream. Maybe the ache in his chest would disappear. Maybe he would go home and find Isaac full of smiles and boundless energy.

But something deep inside Justin whispered the truth.

He didn't really remember falling asleep, but the sound of footsteps walking up the stairs woke him. Justin didn't move as Holster spoke.

“Hey, buddy,” Holster said as he placed a plate and mug on Justin’s desk, “Bits, made you your favorite. You must be starving from all the calories you just burned.”

Holzy left, and Justin surveyed the food and smiled to himself. Honey peach pie and hot chocolate. Although the nice gesture, he felt like vomiting.

When in bed again, Justin fished out his 3ds and a bottle of whiskey his parents gave him for his birthday that he kept hidden for special occasions. He loaded Mario Kart and forgone a shot glass, and just took swigs right out of the bottle. Tears already rolling down Justin’s face even before he started a race.

The next morning, despite a nasty hangover, Justin was awake before Holster. He stashed his whiskey, and changed into running clothes.

No one else was awake, granted it was 4 am, and practice was at 6:30. So Justin grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge, and found the ibuprofen. He downed the pills, grabbed some sunglasses knowing he would need them later, and headed out the door.

The cold air felt amazing on Justin's skin as he jogged down the street. Street lamps lit his way as he headed onto campus.

The sun started to rise and until then, Justin kept his thoughts clear. But with the alcohol purging from his system, Justin couldn't hold back memories. And it's not like he didn't enjoy spending time with Isaac, no Justin loved that kid too much, they just… hurt.

A small kid, who really wasn't so small, with a sunshine smile that could melt any heart. So full of energy; Justin remembers multiple occasions where he would run around Auntie Margaret's backyard until Justin couldn't stand, but Isaac still kept going. Fuck was the kid smart. He knew who people were before he could talk or walk.

Justin eventually found himself near Faber, his legs taking him there without even realizing it. He felt like Jack. He’d been running for almost two hours, and Justin wasn't sure how well he would do in practice seeing as he definitely wasn't in the right head space.

He made his way to Annie’s for breakfast. Justin ordered a bagel and a black coffee. Thank god he was in the habit of bringing his keys and wallet everywhere he went. Justin was hungry, but it hard to get the food down. There was no taste and all the coffee did was burn.

After forcing himself to finish his food, Justin returned to the Haus.

The silence wasn't one he heard often, normally music would play from the kitchen or Dex and Nursey would be fighting. Either way, it wasn't welcome. Justin went to the attic to collect his comforter, whiskey, and changed his clothes then ventured back downstairs.

Justin fished out a bag of chips from the kitchen, then boot up the Wii and selected Mario Kart. He was going drown himself in ten year old whiskey and red shells.

He got through maybe four courses before the alcohol took any real effect. By the time the rest of his housemates came home, Justin was just running into walls and falling off the track.

“Hey Rans,” Holster said somewhere from behind him. “Missed you at practice.”

He knew where Holzy was going to go with this conversation, and Justin wasn't feeling any of it. He took a swig of whiskey and continued to fall into the water. Footsteps up the stairs told Justin that everyone was nice enough to give him space.

Holster made room next to him on the couch then stole the controller, pausing the game while ignoring Justin's slurred protests. “Please talk to me Ransom.”

“Holzy, please I just--leave me alone.”

“No, Justin. You aren't okay and we’re all concerned.”

Justin sighed and looked at the nearly empty bottle in his lap. “It's Isaac.”

“Your nephew?” Justin felt Holster tense up beside him, preparing for a heavy conversation.

“His--um… His dad is a police officer,” tears welled in his eyes, “and uh, got called in when he was off. Must’a put his gun down where Isaac could reach it…”

“No…”

“He shot himself Holzy.” Justin sobbed out. He hated how it sounded in his mouth. “He was fucking four. A fucking child.”

“Oh god, Justin, oh fuck.” Holster wrapped his arms around Justin, his tears soaking Holster’s shirt. Justin latched on for dear life. “I know how much you loved him.”

“He was so young.”

“I know.”

“It's not fair!”

_It should have been me._

“I know.”

People used to tell Justin that it hurts less when you tell people. They must have been liars. Because now was real; he acknowledged what happened and it hurt more than when he pretended it was a lie.

Holster just let him cry, rubbing his back and confirming Justin's pain. His lungs burned and his throat was raw from alcohol and sobs.

“Can you tell me about him?” Holster asked when Justin ran out of tears.

“Holzy, can we jus-- I don't know. Not do that?” Justin let go of his friend and wiped his tears on the blanket.

Holster sighed, but granted him the request. “Are you going to class today?”

“No,” Justin laughed. “Don't think I could get any work done while absolutely shitfaced.”

“Not with that attitude.”

**Author's Note:**

> So um, I wrote this for myself really. I started it the night my own nephew passed away just as a coping mechanism?? And as the week has progressed, I feel like sharing it with others would allows for acknowledgement that this stuff does happen and maybe when I wake up tomorrow I will accept that this pain is real.


End file.
